Twelve New Years Resolutions for Kids: Stopping the Self-Entitled Ment ality

Twelve New Year's Resolutions for Kids:

Stopping the Self-Entitled Mentality

by Christie Barnes

author THE PARANOID PARENTS GUIDE:

Worry Less, Parent Better, and Raise a Resilient Child

(Health Communications, Inc.)

and

author PARENT CUE CARDS Self-Esteem Kits

Chores, Kindergarten Milestones, Swimming Essentials, etc
(South Main Enterprises)

 ---------------------------------------------------------

"Mommy, what was your New Year's Resolution?"  Kids want to know what parents are trying to solve for the New Year.  They will help us parents with our resolutions but do your children have any resolutions of their own, besides doing homework and whining less? 

 

These are great resolutions but tackling the self-esteem mentality will set your children up for life as much as tackling the homework. 

 

It starts with the child who expects a reward for every trip to the grocery store then extends to an iPhone as a reward for the ordinary book report and ends with college graduates refusing to take an entry level job, expecting to start as a manager or executive.

 

Here are Twelve New Year's Resolutions.  Choose one or choose one a month.

 

1)       Helping around the house is a normal necessity (like eating and sleeping).  I just have to do it because it needs to be done without a reward.  College kids complain when their clothes don't automatically pick themselves up.  No one will be there to give them a cookie for cleaning when they grow up.  Some kids have never spent a night away from home until college because of worried, doting parents.

 

2)      I will not force my parents to bribe me to do things I know I should do.  Ask them to help make the list with you and get the items so they are involved and not just passive, bored observers.

 

3)      If I do something good, I should have a reward but not money or extravagant presents.  If your child does help, get good grades (or at least works hard) allow them some free time or some special time with you.  You could even break your one-hour of TV or computer time on a school night as long as they are on track. Just don't offer money and things.

 

4)      I do not deserve to cut the line at the front when I am late because I am wonderful, my parents tell me that.  Yes, your child is wonderful but you need to teach your child to respect others.  Some parents encourage grab all you can get and encourage anything from cutting in line to cheating to get ahead.  One mom had so little respect for others that she demanded that her teen daughter cut the 12 person long Starbucks line because "she is so beautiful and she is late for school."  Then don't get Starbucks…

 

5)      I won't be the best at everything.  I will be good at some things and not others and I will recognize that.  Parents please instill realistic self-esteem.  Some things will be harder for your children than others.  A stocky kid may be great at wrestling or football but not basketball.  We are all born with different strengths that we can play to.

 

6)      I won't quit something I like doing because I am not the best.  (For example, girls who don't win the top awards are prone to give up hobbies they like, like painting, swimming, gymnastics, music because they feel they failed if they weren't first.)

 

7)      I do not need a reward for a grocery store trip.  Parents, don't give in.

 

8)      I do not need something from the gift shop for every trip to the zoo or theme park.  It can be as hard for a parent as a kid to pass up that huge-eyed stuffed baby tiger from the zoo gift shop

 

9)      I do not need to be praised every time I do something good.  I know it myself when I am happy and it makes me happy.  As an adult, we are not praised for everything we do right on the job.  Young adults often have a hard time with this.  Some think of quitting a job because they aren't praised and cannot tell from within themselves that they are doing well by accomplishing tasks.

 

10)    Sometimes a science expert is needed, sometimes a math one, or a cook, or an artist.  I will be the best I can be at my specialty and I won't beat myself up that I can't succeed at everything.  Parents tell their kids they can do or be anything.  Kids have many options but they really can't be and do everything.

 

11)    If I work as hard as I can, I still probably won't be the best in the world.  That sounds cruel but only one person can be the best quarterback in the world, or the best lawyer, or the best top model.  Or just a few will achieve the heights of fame and wealth.  Don't shatter dreams by creating false ones.  Focus on the process, the journey and not a destination that is probably unrealistic.  If your child does become a Hollywood superstar, that is the icing on the cake; he or she needs to just enjoy the acting work along the way.

 

12)    I will take an entry level job at no pay.  Graduates today have lost the concept of starting at the bottom and working their way up.

 

 

Be proud of them but prepare them for real life with realistic rewards and realistic expectations.

 

 

 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Christie Barnes, author of THE PARANOID PARENTS GUIDE, is the mother of triplet 9-yr-olds plus a tween daughter.  She is the founder of Paranoid Parents, dedicated to stop parents worrying about the wrong things.  Her blog, website, Paranoid Parents Anonymous club, and a dozen successful mini-books are helping parents with a "parent worry" extreme make-over and helping kids with a "self-esteem" make-over.  http://www.paranoidparentsguide.com

 

Barnes is featured in the upcoming March 2012 Parenting Magazine (both editions).  She has appeared recently on ABC News Now.  Good Morning America parenting expert Annie Pleshette Murphy said "I love this smart book." This book was featured in the Sunday New York Times; was the 'hit' of NPR, the Chicago Tribune, the LA Times and radio and television across the country.

 

ABOUT THE PARANOID PARENTS GUIDE
The Paranoid Parent's Guide is Confessions of a Slacker Mom meets The Worst Case Scenario Handbook--an irreverent yet imminently practical guide to help parents shun the alarmist parenting culture while keeping their children, sanity, and their budgets healthy.

ELAINE WILLIAMS: Sharing Her Life Lessons One Laugh At A Time

by Cyrus Webb
If you are looking for someone to learn from their example when it comes to dealing with the past and moving forward with a vengeance then the story of Elaine Williams is for you. She is one of those individuals who has learned how to use her own life experiences to help others through laughter and her book STOP THE MADNESS.

As someone who grew up performing she shared with me during our radio discussion on Conversations LIVE back in October 2011 that dealing with her dysfunctional family and her own issues with alcohol helped pave the way for finding her voice using comedy. "Comedy has really helped me to lighten up and not take myself so seriously," Williams says. Having dealt with issues of bulimia and sexual assault in her past, she seen firsthand how by discussing them in a more light-hearted way has opened the door for others to step up and share as well.

One experience she shared during the interview was about discussing some of the things she has been through and having some of those in attendance come up to her afterwards and discuss how they had gone through similar situations. "Laughter is so healing and equalizing," she shares, and that is why she works so hard to use her gift to help others.

Part of what has helped Elaine along her journey has been writing. "It has been a lifesaver," she says. She shares that her current book was in the works for about eight years. After a friend suggested she do a book that kept the process simple, it seemed to flow much easier, the result being STOP THE MADNESS.

It has truly seemed like a full circle process for Elaine. This all began with her love of theater and it being an outlet for her. Once that seed was planted, there was no letting it go. "It's a basic human thing to be creative," she says. In the end, no matter what the background of the individual, I agree with her: People just want to know that they matter.

Congrats to Elaine for using her gift in a way that others are able to open up and express themselves. Find out more information about her and the great work that she is doing on her website www.elainewilliamslive.com.

Brotha Magazine Reveals Its Best Book Of The Year

For Immediate Release

Contact Person: Cyrus Webb
Phone: 716-239-4370 ext. 108
E-mail: pr@nebopublishing.com

 

Brotha Magazine Reveals BEST BOOK OF 2011!

(Buffalo, NY) ~ Brotha Magazine is proud to announce that Patrick Shaffer's book "Love Again: A Spiritual Memoir" has been chosen as its BEST BOOK for reflection in 2012.

 

"Love Again dares to express what most men feel, but fear to say-and what every women longs to hear. This book challenges preconceived notions about the depth of masculine emotion while paving a pathway to self-recovery and healing."

 

Charles Clark, Brotha Magazine's Publisher/Editor says about the choice:  "Whether you are single, dating, married, separated, or divorced Patrick's book is a must read. His transparency will help you uncover what you have tried to bury and help you to know that you will LOVE AGAIN."

It is the book's message of self-discovery that Clark believes will resonate with readers of the book. Even though the book is talking about Shaffer's journey of divorcing, it also talks about the journey of finding out who he really is as a man in all areas of life.

For more information about "Love Again" visit: www.patrickdshaffer.com. For info on the Brotha Magazine please visit Brotha Magazine at www.brothaonline.com or email to info@brothaonline.com.

 

Nebo Publishing * Southgate Road * Buffalo, NY 14215 * 716.239.4370

MS artist Ziggy Adds D. C. Swag To New Single

Mississippi native and recording artist Ziggy knows music, and he also knows when he has a hit on his hands. With the release of his single "Shake It Baby" he believes he has such a hit.


Geared towards the streets and the natural urge to have a good time, Ziggy says "Shake It Baby" will appeal to not just to his fans in Yazoo City, Mississippi and surrounding areas but around the world. This sentiment is shared by actor, author and recording artist Tray Chaney who is featured on the new remix of the single. Chaney heard Ziggy's story and music during his appearance on Conversations LIVE radio show in late 2011 and knew this was an artist with talent and skills that he wanted to work with. "Ziggy's style and music is the truth," says Chaney. "I knew once mixed his swag with mine together on a track it was going to be a wrap."

Having had success with his single "Jumpin' Out" in the past and preparing for the release of his mixtape REAL TALK in March 2012, Ziggy knows that there's no limit to where he can go from here. "This is only the beginning," he says.

Listen to the single here. The song is available for only .99 at www.realdealent.biz. Ziggy is signed to independent label Real Deal Entertainment and managed by Stanley Clark. To find out more about Ziggy and upcoming projects visit www.realdealent.biz. To schedule interviews or events with either Ziggy or Tray Chaney contact Cyrus Webb at cawebb4@juno.com or 601.896.5616.

Cyrus Webb Asks "Is Conversations Magazine Feeding Your Love Of Life?"

(New York Times Bestselling author John Saul seen here with Conversations Magazine)From the time it relaunched in December 2010, Conversations Magazine (www.conversationsmag.com) has been making a name for itself by offering not just insightful interviews and discussions but extras such as motivational messages, delicious recipes, commentaries and entertainment news suitable for members of the entire family.

Today Conversations Magazine has over 3000 print subscribers in 6 countries (United States, Spain, New Zealand, Pakistan, Greece and Zimbabwe), and the momentum seems to be growing with each week.
Editor-In-Chief Cyrus Webb and the team that brings the magazine to life each month have a simple question for you: Is Conversations Magazine feeding your love of life?

If not, make sure you subscribe today! Now through February 5, 2012 you can get a 12 month subscription to Conversations Magazine for only $19.99, shipping included! (regular price is $24.99 for a yearly subscription). Click here to take advantage of this special deal of the yearly subscription: https://www.paypal.com/cgi-bin/webscr?cmd=_s-xclick&hosted_button_id=UGNLZPY82FU8J

For more on Conversations Magazine, visit www.conversationsmag.com. On behalf of the entire team that works on Conversations Magazine and its parent company Shadow Play Entertainment, thank you for your support. Without you, none of what we have accomplished would be possible. CONVERSATIONS MAGAZINE: Feeding your love of live!

2011 Character Building Counts Book Award Winners

2011 Character Building Counts Book Awards

What do Kenyan orphans who yearn to attend school and learn to read have in common with the angels who live in the lowlands of heaven? Both groups are delivering character-building messages in award-winning books. Character Building Counts (CBC) Book Awards is proud to announce the winners of its 2011 Character Building Counts Book Awards contest.

Gold Seal Winners:

The Lowlands of Heaven, F.J. Dagg (Grand Prize Overall Winner)(Fantasy/Sci-Fi)

A beautiful story that illustrates commitment to duty, integrity in personal relationships, service to the unfortunate, and respect for the Creator.

When this Is Over, I Will Go to School, and I Will Learn to Read, Pam Bitterman (Children's)

A true story of hope, friendship, family, and overcoming adversity, with an eye toward inspiring a level of compassion that will lead to greater understanding and humanity.

Silver Seal Winners:

L'Mazeltov, Your Personal Guide to Jewish Childbirth Education, Pamela Nadav, NP (Family)

A value-rich framework for new families, linking generation to generation by inspiring parents to bring meaning and significance into the lives of their children.

Nuclear Undercover Kids Espionage Service (N.U.K.E.S.), Lavern Holdeman (Juvenile Fiction)

Twelve-year-old Shawn Stuckey learns to overcome small town biases by moving toward greater appreciation of gender, cultural, and ethnic diversity.

The Weaver's Loom, P.L. Reid (Historical Fiction)

This story of forgiveness and the will to live explores the struggles of two beautiful women and two beautiful cultures, all bound together by a great human tragedy, the Holocaust.

Ride to the Stars, Suzanne Gene Courtney (Children's)

A story that helps children who have experienced the death of a loved one to understand that life continues on the other side.

Bronze Seal Winners:

Giving God a Good Time, Patricia C. Campbell (Spirituality)

Life is intended to be lived fully and joyfully. We honor that gift by giving God a good time through us … as us.

When You Say 'Thank You,' Mean It, Mary O'Donohue (Parenting)

Gives busy parents fun, practical, and effective tools to teach their children lifelong values such as gratitude, compassion, respect for others, and integrity.

Princess Lydia and the Fire Breathing Dragon, Denise Byers & Danielle Gray (Children's)

Challenges can be overcome. People are handy-capable—not handicapped. Girls can be heroines, and boys can accept help! Embrace each others' differences, and strive for peace.

Take a Stand, Mike Cattolico (Autobiography/Military History)

About the capacity to endure via stamina and fortitude, as told through the eyes of a navy deep sea diver. Also about the importance of living up to your fullest potential.

It's Heart Work, Evelyn L. Polk (Memoir)

Caring for youth who are in emotional pain can bring joy and anguish; even so, it is possible and necessary to do. What it takes, most of all, is a genuine connection of the hearts.

Rented Silence, Lucia Mann (Historical Fiction)

A story of human suffering during a brutal period in British Colonial history. At the same time, this is an inspirational tale of hope and love.

Congratulations to our Gold, Silver, and Bronze winners. Character Building Counts Book Awards has been honored to host this 2011 contest. Every participant deserves praise for writing and sharing their important messages. For details about who you can be a part of this year's awards visit www.cbcawards.com.

Nesta Aharoni Discusses Character Building Counts Awards

by Cyrus Webb

 

At a time when authors are looking for attention for the work they are producing, individuals like Nesta Aharoni are ready to celebrate those who are providing a clear message that is free from some of the negativity and destructive behavior and language so prevalent today.

 

Through the Character Building Counts Awards (aka CBC Awards), authors are able to get attention for their work and recognition for providing a message that resonates with the world. Nesta allowed Conversations LIVE Radio to be the place where the 1st winners of the CBC Awards was announced, and Conversations Magazine is pleased to recognize the winners as well.

 

I talked with Nesta about the idea for the awards and what she hopes you and the authors that submit get from CBC.

 

 

How did the idea for the Character Building Counts Awards come about?

Having been an author who won three book awards, I became mindful of how helpful book awards are to book marketing. A seal on a front cover lends respectability and acceptability to the authors who win them. The press releases and Internet marketing that accompany these awards announce your presence as an author and the quality of your work. Because my book is about decency and character building, it seemed only natural for me to offer a venue for writers who deliver character-building messages to showcase their work through a one-of-a-kind Character Build Counts format.

 

 What do you hope the awards do to encourage and inspire authors who might enter and especially those who win?

My hope is that in this graphic, loud, and explicit world we live in, authors will learn there are publishers, other authors, readers, and media personnel who appreciate words that inspire honorable and responsible living. I hope that CBC Book Awards will be the first but not the last entity to openly appreciate these types of messages. Additionally, I hope the authors' ideas will ripple out into society and help create a kinder, safer world for all of us.

 

For those developing their book what advice would you give them about what they want to make sure they include if they want it to convey a real message?

An author's message need not hit the reader on the head in order to be effective. New writers should consider the following: Characters who role model decent behavior can be powerful influences. Stories that display lessons of growth and improvement can be influential and easy to connect with. Good struggling with evil can be inspiring. Overcoming odds can be moving. Protecting the innocent can stir emotions. Nonfiction messages are equally powerful, as their authors authoritatively pen messages of significance to their readers. Whether you delicately weave your message through character development or plot, or you teach your readers through nonfiction concepts, the desire to touch your fellow citizens and stir them to compassion or improvement or contribution is at the core of Character Building Counts Book Awards.

 

 If there are those interested in competing in the 2012 cycle what is the process?

Enrolling in Character Building Counts Book Awards is as easy as one-two-three. Visit our Web site at www.CBCAwards.com, go to the "enter" page, fill out the form, and make your enrollment payment. Please note that we are now in early enrollment for the 2012 contest, which means a discounted fee. We accept all genres of books.