[Ask Mary Ellen] Allowing Love to Transform and Detoxify your Soul

Holding in anger or any negative emotion can allow toxins to enter at the very level of your soul changing your energy patterns and throwing you into disharmony.

First, you must look at how you allow these toxins to become part of your existence. Do you hold onto past hurts? Are you unforgiving of yourself and/or others? Do you have judgments about yourself, others or our society as a whole? Do you let go and allow the Universe – your world to flow freely? Do you take care physically and mentally of this temple for your Holy Spirit or do you feed it with junk food and fill your mind with the “negative” news talk?

Spiritual teachers have always pointed to the soul/ heart as the seat of consciousness. Anyone who has taken the time to explore the soul, and more importantly the connection to the heart, knows the connection between these two and a consciousness greater than the ego. Approaching life with an open heart means you have opened the door to the greater consciousness at the soul level.

 Become aware of how you can create positive change by choosing the language you use and the perception of how you see your world. You may already have ideas about phrases you would like to transition out of your vocabulary. It is challenging to examine how you see your world. You do not need to actively try to change either of these patterns just become more conscious of yourself. Treat and speak to others the way you would like to be treated and spoken to by them!

When you affirm you are fulfilled, instead of articulating deficiencies, you are committing to your natural essence of human existence. Choose to focus on satisfaction instead of dissatisfaction. At your very soul level understand the energy of your thoughts determines the response you receive from the Universe/God. When you work with all of this creative power within you, it will empower you to achieve the peaceful life you want to live.

The secret for any detoxification process is to become grateful. Allow the power of God’s love to transform you. God and His love transforms ordinary humans into compassionate beings to vibrate at a level of love and kindness. You can raise your vibrational level through gratitude. Feel gratitude for all you have and all the goodness God has bestowed upon you.

Feel gratitude for everything! There is always a reason to be grateful even if you are simply grateful that something good has happened to someone else!

To detoxify your soul, you must
1. Let go of past hurts
2. Forgive unconditionally – especially yourself.
3. Stop judging yourself and others.
4. Allow all emotions/toxins that come into contact with your soul to be felt in entirety and let go without judgment.

To have a peaceful full life you must detoxify, especially at this very basic level of the soul. 

Regularly release these toxins through writing – such as journaling or crying as your tears will flush out your toxins. When you feel a toxin (sadness or yucky feeling) FEEL it let it. Let it come out (as tears or another positive way such as boxing or exercise) and do not judge it. You can sing or make any kind of sound to free up your soul. Music is very Healing!

 Become aware and elevate your soul. By opening your soul to free up the toxins (sadness, judgements or other yucky feelings) that have been binding you will make you feel tender and vulnerable. That is okay. Again, do not judge it! This process takes practice, patience, compassion and unconditional love.

Sincerely with love,
Mary Ellen Ciganovich
Author of "Healing Words, Life Lessons to Inspire” and "T.R.U.T.H- Taking Responsibility Unleashes True Healing"
www.askmaryellen.com  askmaryellen@aol.com  423-653-6446

Top 5 Tips for Caregiving

by Iris Waichler, MSW, LCSW

The National Center for Caregiving reports there are “approximately 43.5 million caregivers that have provided unpaid care to an adult or child in the last 12 months.” Being a caregiver can be challenging, rewarding, humbling, and stressful. People in the U.S. continue to live longer thanks to improved medications and medical treatment. These numbers will likely grow. Below are some important tips to keep in mind if you find yourself in a caregiver role:

1. Put Together a Caregiver Team: Caregivers must balance their role as a caregiver with family, work, school, and other relationships and commitments. There may be times when you cannot always do it alone. You also may need breaks because you are physically tired, you have health issues, or you need to emotionally recharge. Consider what tasks will need to be done and how frequently they are necessary?  Identify possible candidates to help. Consider family, friends, neighbors, and people from your local religious institutions. You can also hire professional help. Your local Area on Aging office can refer you. You can also find a local geriatric care specialist in your area who can help you assess and arrange what will be needed @ www.aginglifecare.org

2.   You Bring Your Previous Relationship to Your Role as a Caregiver: If you are taking care of a loved one your previous relationship may influence how smoothly your new role as caregiver goes. For example, if you are a  caregiver for a parent, and suddenly you are parenting your parent this may be a difficult adjustment for you both. Was it a positive relationship or one filled with conflict? Were those conflicts resolved to everyone’s satisfaction? This influences why you are taking on the role of caregiver. Is it because you want to help? Do you feel obligated and really don’t want to do it? If your relationship was one of  mutual love and trust your caree is more apt to work with you rather than against you in your new role as caregiver. If you assume this role out of obligation you need to consider if your are the best person to do it. Sometimes a non-family member may be more successful in this role especially doing personal care tasks like bathing and dressing.

3. Understand Finances and Insurance: In order to develop a caregiving plan you need to know what financial options are available. Take a close look at insurance coverage to make sure you understand what is covered in terms of home care like physical, occupational, and speech therapy, home health aides, and nursing. Also review coverage for nursing home care. Assisted living is generally not covered by insurance. If your loved one is a veteran there may be benefits available. Also if you have limited finances, medicaid may be an option. Eligibility is determined by financial assets and varies between states. Go to https://www.medicaid.gov/  Medicare can cover skilled nursing home stays after a hospitalization and short term home help like physical, occupational, speech therapies and a home health aide depending on your diagnosis. Go to https://www.medicare.gov/ to learn what is covered.

   4.      Seek Emotional Support-One of the most common mistakes that we make as
            caregivers is to ignore our own needs. Burnout is often the result. When you become
            a caregiver it can be emotionally and physically demanding. You may find yourself
            grieving over the loss of the person your loved one once was. This can be very
            painful and take an emotional toll. You need to allow time for yourself to physically recharge. It is also very important to have someone you can trust and rely on to talk
            to at times that feel overwhelming. It may be a family member, friend, or clergy. It may be useful to find a healthcare professional with expertise in aging to offer counseling.
            On line caregiver chat sites can offer comfort, resources, and support.

   5.     Identify Warning Signs-Your loved ones may not be able to self assess when their
           physical or mental condition begins to decline. Identify warning signs which are mutually       agreed upon indicators that additional help is warranted. Watch for things like falling,
            memory loss, mobility decline, lack of attention to personal hygiene, sudden weight
            loss or gain, sudden unexplained  damage to car. These are potential indicators there may
            be functional problems your loved one is experiencing.

Iris Waichler, MSW, LCSW has been a patient advocate and medical social worker for
            40 years. She has done individual, group, and family counseling. She is the award winning author of the Best Self Help:Relationships Book of 2016 Role Reversal How to Take Care of Yourself and Your Aging Parents. She also does freelance writing on health related topics. Find out more about Iris at www.iriswaichler.com.