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Friday, June 22, 2012

Mary's Motivational Message: Celebrating Father's Day Every Day

The month of June is a beautiful month because it is during this month we set aside time to honor DAD.   
I do believe that with fatherhood comes an opportunity to be exposed to millions of valuable life lessons, life challenges and teachings that provide insight. I would like to set aside a moment to share a few examples that have inspired me throughout the years.
Example 1: The reality of Dads and who they are:
So often we hear and read about the men who are not being good providers or good role models for their children and families. We have all heard the reports of those men who have walked away from their families and have just detached from their responsibilities. Well, trust me when I state that the painting is not a true reflection of the entire portraits depth.  The reality is that those Dad’s who do step up outweigh those who don’t. The majority of fathers are proudly standing on the frontline each and every day for their families, while being the constant protector.

-          They are working extremely hard to ensure that shelter is provided and warm food is on the table.
-          They are inspiring their daughters, encouraging their sons while being emotionally supportive of their wife or significant other.
-          So many of you beautiful DADS make various sacrifices so that your families will have what it is they need to thrive.

My mom once shared with me how my maternal grandfather, who was a proud City Employee,  so often to prolong the purchasing of new work boots, would wrap his torn work boots with duck tap because he felt that the money would be better utilized within the family home.

-          So many Dads are the constant protector. Many times when we think they’re reading the news paper or guarding the remote control, numerous DADS are actually thinking about, “is my wife ok, our my children alright, will the bills be paid this month, are there enough groceries in the cupboards, is everyone ok, am I doing all that I need to do. Am I being the husband and provider GOD has ordered me to be.
-          Not the minority but the majority of men love, cherish and adore their children beyond what we could ever imagine.
Example 2: Pertains to never giving up on your relationship with your children:
Two years ago, a dad was sharing with me, his frustration with his daughter.  Years prior there had been words pertaining to him being absent from her life during her adolescent years. And as a result, they had not spoken in some time. Whatever advice or suggestions I provided, he remained hopeless and bitter. How many of you DADS are filling a void because there is a rift with your child? How many know a DAD who is facing various challenges with their child and is consumed with guilt?  Well, I’m here to say that:
-          It’s never too late to transform your relationship with your child
-          There are some things you can give up on but never give up on cultivating a positive relationship with your child
-          God has the power  with blink of an eye lid to  bring about a healing and deeper understanding
-          Fight for renewal in your relationship with your child and remember that through GOD all things are possible
Example 3: Pertains to Having No Regrets:
For many of us Fathers Day opens up wounds that are trying so desperately to heal. Many of you like myself, had to say good-by to our DAD much too soon. At least you feel that it was too soon. Two years ago my father went in for an outpatient surgery and passed away on the operating table. We had shared a conversation the day before laughing, sharing stories; just having a great time. His last words to me were, “sweetie, Daddy will talk to you tomorrow” but that opportunity never came. I find it difficult searching for father’s day cards and not purchasing one for my dad. I miss my dad so much. I’m so thrilled that whatever we needed to address we did. He knew how I felt and I knew his heart as it pertained to me.
The message to you this Fathers Day morning is this:
 Life is so very short and because we are only here for moment, you don’t have a life time to re event your child and children you don’t have a life time to re invent your DAD. All you have is this moment. Enjoy your DAD, love your DAD, and cherish your DAD.                                                                                                                                                                                                                  
When was the last time you said Dad I love you, Dad I appreciate you or thank you Dad just because. Well, no better time than today, to get some pep in your step and spoil your daddy.  And as you journey towards Father’s Day, spread the love around, as you are out and about extend a happy Father’s Day to the various Dads that you come into contact with.
And to all of you Dads out there standing on the front line 24/7 for your families, we see you, we honor you, we love you and we want you to know, that even though we set aside this day to treat you like a king and shower you with love, within our hearts we know and acknowledge that Father’s Day is actually every day.
*Mary E. Gilder is the author of the award winning novel, “A Misrepresentation of Myself.” Mary can be contacted at or Also, visit her website at:                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          

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