Thursday, April 9, 2020

[The J Spot with Shari Alyse] Your Flaws Are Beautiful

For years I tried to be perfect. I didn’t want people to know that below these shoulders was a body that didn’t fit my thinner face. I didn’t want people to know that I wore hair pieces and wigs. Somehow, I thought that by being perfect, I would be more loved.

The only ones that loved me more were the people who cared about that kind of thing. And the thing about those kind of people, they were ultimately the ones I didn’t want in my life and wouldn’t stick around through the tough stuff anyway.

The kicker about all of this, the more and more I hid who I really was and presented what I thought others wanted, I was the one that didn’t end up liking this person. I was the one who always felt discontent, inauthentic and a mere shadow of myself.

The beautiful thing about you and I are our imperfections, our flaws, quirks and crooked smiles. The beautiful thing about us is that we were created to be exactly who we are and each moment that we choose and allow ourselves to show up in all of our imperfect perfection, is truly when we begin living.

I know it can be tough when the world around you seems to demand more from you. When you find yourself unconsciously comparing yourself to the more successful person, the flatter abs, the ‘always’ vacationing couple, the seemingly ‘always' happy person and the ‘fill in the blank’ of anyone else or anything else you compare yourself to.

 I get it. It’s right in your face wherever you turn. But the important thing to note is that there is nobody that has it all together. There is nobody that is perfectly happy in every single area of their life - from health, relationships, career, looks, etc. We all have been dealt a hand that has been tailor made for us - a hand that helps us grow, expand, heal and love. A hand that simply wants you to begin to understand your worth and value and one that knows that only you can offer your kind of greatness.

So enough with this hiding! Enough with the sitting on the sidelines of your life! And enough with the dimming of your light! We need you. The world needs you. Your flaws are your strength and your personal power. Use them. Embrace them. Be proud of them. They are yours and not a soul on this planet will ever be able to carry them the way that you do.

And for the record, I now post full-body pictures online. I now have spoken very openly about my hair or rather the hair I bought and I even use the hashtag #wigs when I do. You see, the day that I decided to take a real good look within, was the day that I saw all of me. And all of me and all of you is pure and indescribable beauty.

Your flaws are unbelievably beautiful and unbelievably YOU.

Shari Alyse is the best selling author of the book, Love Yourself Happy. She is also a motivational speaker and self-love coach. If you’d like to work with Shari, you can find out more about her at

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